From the mouth of babes...Episode 1

Have you seen the Dish Network television ad that portrays a group of people eating dinner and the television is sucking thing off the table and sticking them to the screen. The conversation goes on about how cable sucks so much that this is the end effect. The other people go on to say that their television doesn't suck because they have Dish Network. Cute commercials especially the companion piece that shows the toddler in his walker being sucked across the floor by the television. The other one sucks up the cat, which I especially enjoyed. I love cat humor.... anyway.

So you are probably wondering why I brought up these adds. Well, I will tell you. I have the type of television that you have to switch to the device you want to watch. If you want to watch the DVD you have to hit the button and it kicks it over to the DVD player. Some may remember having to turn the VCR (for all you kiddies, movies used to come on tape) on and change the TV to CH.3 or 4 and watch your movie. I don't have this type of television, mine you have to switch the inputs with the remote. If you don't get it, you may not have a television and Nixon is no longer president.

Anyway.... Wife 1.0 and I had been watching a movie the night before and when we went to bed I didn't switch the input back to cable. When you do this and turn the TV on it justshows a grey screen. Fast forward six hours and son 1.0 or "The Boy" is awake and wants to watch cartoons. So we trudge out to the living room, this is the room that looks like Geoffreythe Giraffe from Toys are Us puked in our living room as Wife 1.0 puts it, to turn on the wonder box of entertainment and Shazam! A grey screen.

The Boy looks up at me and with all the incredulity that a three year old can muster, looked me right in the eye and stated as a point of FACT "but....MY television doesn't suck!"

Wife 1.0 was forced to rescue me due to my falling flat on my arse and laughing so friggin' hard I almost ruptured my spleen.

Teh Rev.

UPDATE

I can't hardlybelieve it. The Chrysler dealer called today to see how our service "experience" went. I wish I had been home. Wife 1.0 was the lucky recipient of the call. I think she did a fine job, especially after she gave them the mommy version of three kids and mommy trapped in an all consuming fireball from HELL due to their lack of competence.

Up next.... My lovely experience trying to log into my college web site. NO, I am not going to name my college. They have the ability to mess with my academic life and that kind oftrouble I don't need. I will let you see the email I sent them.

*censured collegiate name* web site sounds like a really great idea. I just wish I could access it. See, I went to the web site my.censuredcollegiatename.edu and found the login. Not having a login for my.censuredcollegiatename I went to the help section. There I found the instruction set

-The first step in using *censured collegiate name* is to log in to the system. You will need your domain login information. This is the username -and password you use to access your "@censured collegiate name.edu" e-mail. If you do not have this information, or you have forgotten your -password, please visit the Domain Account Request page, and complete a New Account Request.
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-Once you have your domain account information, you will need to visit *censured secure web page* to retrieve your *censured collegiate name* -login information. This information will consist of your student ID number and a randomly assigned password.
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-After retrieving your *censured collegiate name* login information, simply enter your ID number in the "User Name" box, and your password (from -*censured secure web page*) in the "Password" box, and click "Login" or press "Enter" on your keyboard.
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-You should now be logged in to *censured collegiate name* and ready to start looking around.


Actually, I think this should read, The first step in using *censured collegiate name* is to RETRIEVE your login information IF you have a @censured collegiatename.edu email account. If you don't then go request one from the Domain account requestpage and wait 7 days for your information to show up in the mail, then you can retrieve your *censured collegiate name* account information and then you can login to *censured collegiate name*.

I, luckily, already possess a @censured collegiate name.edu email account. Well I have half of what I need, see I auto forward *censured collegiate name* email to my personal e-mail box so that I can reduce the number of email accounts I maintain. Unfortunately I do not remember my email account password. Well, noworries, I try a few guesses and manage to suspend my account. That's OK, if fact that's great! Good security! So now to get my unlocked and my password reset.

No Online Password Reset Option...

I called the help desk. Yep, they can help. Fill out the online form and up to 7 days form now I will receive my changed password in the mail. 7 days...Can't reset my password online and the nice gentleman from the help desk can't change it either.

So in, hopefully, less than 7 days I will get my password reset in the mail. THEN I will be able to retrieve the *censured collegiate name* Logon ID and Password. Then I will be able to login to *censured collegiate name* and have a look around.

I will wait the 7 days and go through these steps because I do want to look at my grades and such online. However, If I were a business person, which I am, and I had to go through these steps to access information I would not even bother. If I can't get to the information I need in three clicks I would be happy to go somewhere else.

Online account creation and password resets are a MUST for a professional website. The people who access your website are customers regardless if they are students and making customers jump through hoops to access the information that you want your customers to see is bad design and bad practice.


OK. Am I out of line here? Tell me the truth. Shouldn't we expect institutes of higher learning to hold themselves to a higher standard? Shouldn't we expect that they would at LEAST hold themselves to standard practices for industry? This just frustrated the hell out of me....can you tell?

Lost but not forgotten.

Well, its seems like I got lost, but not really. I have been busy though. I have a new position with a different business group in the Incredible Large Corporation that I work for. This is a happy happy joy joy moment! So I had to spend a lot of time getting ready for the big job move. Hopefully I will get back to the schedule of once a week updates with funny links....maybe....new job is a touch busier than the old job so we will see. I mean, you wouldn't expect me to update from home or anything....would you???

I was going to post about my car issues but a friend thought I should just publish the chat transcript with him...so I will...

ME... So, I took my car in last wednesday to have the fuel pump replaced. It was ready mid Thursday morning but with schedules I was able to pick it up till Friday morning. Friday the check engine light comes on again. This I figured was due to a loose gas cap, thats what lead to the discovery of the bad fuel pump. So I drive it home friday night, tighten the gas cap and tell Kerrie to drive it. Light stays on. This morning I tell Kerrie I will call the dealerhip from work. I then drive to Costco to get gas.
Friend of Me... uh oh
ME... So there I am at Cosco. Pumping fuel in the vehicle, cleaning empty pop bottles out of my car and this guy pulls around and yells, " Hey! Is that gas leaking out of your car?" Wha? I look around, I don't see any gas...walk around the car and HOLY SH*T THERE IS AN F'N LAKE OF GAS!!!... 9.9 gallons to be exact. So I shut the pump off, the gas attendent goes to work on the spill and I look under the car and make a deduction. When they replaced the fuel pump they have to disconnect the gas tank because the fuel pump is IN the tank. When they put the car back together they forgot to connect the filler tube back up to the gas tank. This realisation elevates me to a level of pissed off that I did not know was obtainable at that hour of the morning on a Monday. Usually I have to work most of a day to get to that level.
Friend of Me... FU&*!
ME... So I drive the car back to the dealer, and holding on to my temper my the slimmest of threads, explain the issue to the " service representative" who almost swallows his tongue. Within 30 minutes I have my car back, line reconnected and a full tank of gas provided by the freindly service department at Coon Rapids Chrysler. So....How was your morning?
Friend of Me... LOL
Friend of Me... I just read this to Another friend of Me.
Friend of Me... Dude I am so proud of you for not going postal on the dealership with a BFG
Friend of Me... Man I miss you, your stories are even more fun when you're telling them in person.
ME... I was so frikkin mad I was shaking. If I had lost my temper I would have punched the guy. Wasn't really his fault, but he was on the front lines and he did eveything just right. Avoided eye contact, spoke in soothing tones, no sudden movements....
ME... I am still pissed.
Friend of Me... I bet
ME... Nothing quite like realising that you have been driving around in a potential bomb for three days.
Friend of Me... I'm sure you were like an uncaged starved tiger
ME... Yeah, He was definelty in the lions den.
Friend of Me... Yeah, that is um...I have noe response to that
ME... Bit unnerving really...
Friend of Me... at least
ME... I was just waiting for them to bring me a bill. They didn't, but I was ready to go nuclear. Warhead was armed. We were at DefCon 5 and the bombers were in the air.
Friend of Me... LOL
Friend of Me... I'm crying over hear
Friend of Me... here
ME... I mean, I am no mechanic, but I would have thought somebody would have thought to hook the filler line back to the MF'n fuel tank. For christ sake the Oil Change guy could have figured that one out and he doesn't have an 8th grade education, much less the advance training possesed by an "ASE Certified" mechanic working at a "5 STAR" dealership!!! I hope they send me a survey....Commie ass riders!!!
Friend of Me... LOL
ME... I may right a letter....Hell, I may right two!


To heck with the letter. I am posting it to the blog!!!